The Matriarch

I come by the title "matriarch" honestly. Grandma told me I was in line for it when I was probably thirteen ( I had no idea what it meant).  She said that after her passing, Aunt Marjie would take over and then me.  We were talking about the Royal family as I recall, and she was doing her best to explain what it all meant.

I remember asking Aunt Marjie about it later on, maybe when I was twenty or so. She, in her slightly blond terminology, made it sound like a great triumph. And when she died. Mom came into the title. We talked about it a few times, then her interest waned. It came to my mind again when Mom passed over in May of 2010.

I am the matriarch of my family. Certainly I can't claim the same status as Rose Kennedy or the Queen Mother. I am wife, Ma, Grandma.  I am Matriarch.

There is something about the title, however.

It is an ancient rite of passage, or maybe just old-fashioned, given to the oldest female--or at least the one who manages to remember the title and carry it forward. It should bring with it respect, wisdom and maybe a bit of groveling on the family's part.

Alas, nobody in my family recognizes the entitlement. To them I am Ma ( can you make the meatballs?), wife (Honey, what's for dinner!) and Grandma ( Can you buy me some XBox games?). If is mentioned at all, it is with a snigger and a comment, "That means you're OLD, Ma!"

I am thinking that when I turn 62 in seven months that I should do it up right, with a tiara, a royal wave and my subjects rolling out a purple carpet while I in my ermine-trimmed robe make my way to a silver Bentley jammed with Matriarch-worthy gifts....sigh.

Here's the thing. I will settle for the wisdom, the respect and a hug now and then. I don't need anything, not really, except maybe a Kindle Fire and the sway bar link on my car fixed.  Or maybe a license plate that acknowledges the fact. And a few of my traditions carried on.

Nope, I'm not the Queen Mother--not even the Queen.

I am Ma, Wife, Grandma.

I am also MATRIARCH.