Catsmack

With sincere apologies to my cat-loving friends (you know who you are), and to Hubby who attracts strays like catnip--what do you find so enticing about felines?

Let's examine canine behavior first.

The dog's love is unconditional. No matter how grievous your attitude toward him, he will still wash your face given the slightest opportunity.  If you go out the back door to put the garbage out and come back through the front, you will be greeted like a long lost buddy.  He will wait patiently outside the bathroom door. He will happily share your dinner, if not his.

Then there is the cat.  You go away for a week. The cat remains in the dent on the back of your sofa. His response to your return? A loud meow of indignation that he had to have a used litter box because you didn't leave him one for each day.

The dog will wag and chase his tail in excitement and anticipation of playtime.

The car, bored with his bells and string, will lick himself.  Me? Sweat? Please get real.

The dog will bring you his favorite toy and chase it till he is dizzy.

The cat will grudgingly show off, swatting cutely at a mouse or ball. When he is sick of the game in 3.7 seconds, he will choose to bite your ankle instead.  Then he will go off to lick himself.

The dog, never knowing when he might eat again, will gratefully scarf down dog biscuits, candy bars, peaches and the last strip of bacon.

The cat, expecting to be waited upon, will tongue the tender tidbits then stare at the rest with a withering look at you, his servant.  He wanted salmon today, not chicken.  With the switch of his tail, he is off to his corner again to--you guessed it--lick himself.

The dog will protect his household by barking furiously at strangers, mailmen and the occasional mosquito.

The cat will ignore the intruder and finish licking himself.

You can't own a cat.  He will make it clear from the start that he is lord of the manor.

You can't own a dog, either.  You have to adopt a dog, taking him in on equal footing as a family member.

As near as I can tell, a dog wants to be with his "pack" 24/7.  He will groggily follow you to the kitchen sink, the laundry room, the back steps.

The cat will sleep for twenty hours, occasionally raising one sleepy lid. He will spend perhaps an hour eating and socializing.

And, of course, the rest of the time? You guessed it. He will be licking himself.